You don’t necessarily need to be stuck in a sexual rut or fighting your way out of a dry spell to want to shake things up in the bedroom once in a while. A little variety when it comes to sex is good for everyone. It keeps your creativity sharp, and it keeps your lover thinking about you long after they’ve left your bed.
So stop thinking you need a “good” reason to want to get your freak on once in a while. Loving sex and wanting to make the most of it is reason enough! Here are a few sweet moves and ideas to inspire you, but don’t be afraid to come up with more of your own.
1. Play with power dynamics.
Even adventurous couples tend to settle into certain roles after being together a while, and there’s nothing wrong with that. But flipping the script can be seriously hot, so don’t be afraid to give it a try some night.
Are you usually the more submissive partner in the bedroom? Surprise your partner by telling them you really want to take the reins tonight and then riding them senseless. Or maybe you’re typically the more aggressive one. Ask your partner to have their way with you tonight and do anything they like.
2. Experiment with public sex.
If you’re like most couples, you probably have the most sex in your bedroom, and that’s fine. But an occasional location switch can really work wonders for the libido, especially when that location involves a little risk.
The possibility of getting caught can really heighten your pleasure, but you don’t necessarily need to go full exhibitionist to reap the benefits. Try pulling over for an impromptu curbside tryst during a road trip sometime or getting frisky in the back row of a movie theater. Even the novelty of a backyard touching session after dark can add a real jolt to your routine.
3. Put on a show for your partner.
And you can take this suggestion to mean whatever you want it to, because all the possibilities are great for your sex life. For instance, you can treat your partner to a striptease or even a lap dance the next time you feel extra-sexy. Everyone likes the idea of a partner performing for them, and it’s lots of fun for the performer, too.
Or, if you’re in the mood to get a little naughtier, you can touch yourself for your partner. Watching a partner masturbate is a red-hot experience, because you’re watching them do something you’d usually never get to see. Of course, it’s entirely up to you whether you want to let them get involved or if they only get to watch this time.
4. Add toys to the mix.
As with masturbation, play that includes sex toys is something many people experience as a regular part of their intimate solo life. Yet toys are just as fun to play with when a partner’s along for the ride, so don’t be afraid to bring the idea up for discussion sometime. How you use your toy of choice together is up to you, but the possibilities are endless.
Start by introducing an approachable, versatile toy you may already own – like a magic bullet – into your play. You can use it on yourself or your partner as part of foreplay. You can wedge it between you as you make love to take the guesswork out of toe-curling orgasms. And if you like how that goes, you can shop for more toys together. Vibrating penis rings, wearable couple’s vibes, and butt plugs are all great options to try at some point.
5. Treat your partner to an erotic massage.
Touch is such a powerful thing, in an erotic context or otherwise. But so many couples fall out of the habit of touching one another just for its own sake. Introduce that delicious sense of discovery and enjoyment back into your relationship with a full-body massage that includes all the trimmings.
Try surprising your partner at the end of a long day with a sensual, inviting setup complete with scented candles, beautiful fabrics, soothing music, delicious cocktails, etc. When you’re ready, have them lie down so you can treat them to a head-to-toe massage using your choice of your hands plus massage oil, a vibrating wand, or both. Slowly work the kinks out of all their tired muscles one at a time. Then, when they’re ready, you can finish them off with a classic happy ending.
Of course, these aren’t the only ways to keep your sex life peppy and your partner intrigued, but they’re definitely a few to start with. Just let your creativity (and your naughty imagination) flow when you feel like mixing things up. You’ll both love the results.